To my friends this will come as no big surprise but I am very flakey. I have started thinking about getting out of debt and trying to learn a trade that I can do anywhere. I have narrowed down my choices to two things either teacher (the family business) which will require three years of school most likely. It doesn't pay well but there is a lot of time off that coincides with my daughters time off. My other idea is to learn to work on cars. This fills two needs first is the desire to have a trade I can get a job with anywhere. Second the need to feel like more of a man. I didn't grow up with a dad and I don't know how to fix shit. I am not even sure that I would want to fix cars for a living, but for some reason it fills my need to do something blue coller which is a more natural fit for me. Everyone in my family for the most part is college educated and successful in their own way. I don't think I would be looked down on, but blue collar was never the goal in my family. I am very excited about the possibility of learning to work on cars or weld or something like that even though I have a job that pays really well and I don't have to work hard at it. I use my brain for a living yet it isn't satifying for some reason. I think I was more happy driving a truck which depressed me at the time because it wasn't a career and it didn't pay shit and I felt like a failure but now I just don't give a shit. I am making blue collar jobs more romantic in my head when in actuallity it isn't and it is simply the grass being greener. When I had truck driving jobs I hated them and wanted to do what I'm doing now and of course now I want to do them again. I am stupid. When I'm honest I realize that it is simply the fact that I hate work and can think of a million better things to do with my time. Heres hoping comedy will end up my job at some point because it is the only job I can see myself liking.

Rock on,

The Enforcer


"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson