Treatment's not just for Robert Downey anymore

Yesterday I took my alcohol asessment and I found out how long I'm going to be in it and how much it's going to cost.

I will be doing it 5 days a week for 3.5 hours a day for one month then once a week for 6 months. After that a year and a half once a month. What a gigantic pain in the ass. As anyone knows who knows me I haven't been drinking. I had to explain how much I wanted to do this to help myself leave alcohol behind. I frankly haven't been thinking about alcohol at all. I think I will end up drinking sometime down the road just more responsibly, see I will throw.....

I thought it was amusing how she kept telling me that I couldn't REALLY not drink without this class. I realized I didn't really need this class over the last month.

I am very very thankful that I am able to do this class though. This is a true gift. I won't have a DUI on my record and if I don't fuck up it will be over before I know it.

It is going to be expensive but hey look I'm ROLLING in money this is no big deal.

I guess in summary I am not looking forward to this class at all but I'll tell this is great news.

The bad news is that the class runs from 6-9:30 which means I won't be able to do comedy for a month, which is fine I am writing a lot right now.

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Bush still claims that there is a tie between al quaeda and Iraq. Even though the CIA says there isn't.

There is a tie between that like there's a tie between me and Kevin Bacon
What is this six degrees of foreign policy.

What's next are they going to kill Ben Affleck to stop Hollywood from making bad films.

They say they were helping the people of Iraq by taking a bad man from his dictatorship. I think that's true, but if you're going to start removing bad leaders can we start here, I need a fucking job.

If we are going to go to war with countries over terrorism we have to attack every country where there's Muslims cause those dudes blow shit up wherever they live. Well now that I think of it Religion blows shit up wherever it is. Christians blow shit up all the time. I mean every time I feel really shameful after beating off I just think damned you Jesus, and then I want to blow something up.

I heard Hindus blew up a train last year, don't give out Vishnu toys with a hamburger happy meal or you're gonna have trouble.

Thank you good night.

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"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson