Last night was a fun yet frustrating evening. First show I felt very tight and a little angry at myself for doing that. Second show I decided to throw myself out there a little bit more and felt better about it. I decided that a half gainer with no water in the pool was important and I accomplished that almost, I still need to throw myself off the cliff a little bit more. Ok so that was cool and I had fun.

There were three mafia members in effect there Mastermind, The Accountant, and myself. Ok I didn't see The accountants set but I did see two Mastermind sets and I think he is doing great he is the most comfortable he has been on stage ever. That will benefit him big time. Ok here is where the night got weird me and Glott and the Mastermind went to Waldos behind Pigass. Jerry Rocha who featured was there (he was very fucking funny) and The Gout was representin' and there were girls quite a few girls and they were talking to us. Ok now we all had just had good sets and things are rolling smoove for us. I'm thinking that this is turning out to be not a bad night. Then the weird shit started happening. Each one of us were stopped at different times by different cock blockers.

Why of all nights would they choose last night, finally there are girls and guys can't stop fucking things up for us. Perfect example GLott starts talking to hot little thing and the Gout just mumbles in and fucks thing up like she doesn't exist and what is happening isn't happening. I finally get to talk to this girl who I like (I don't know her but I like what she looks like) and not three words in this guy wanders in says something positive about my set then keeps talking until the King of Cock blockers Jerry comes up and starts talking about Nintendo to the guy who interrupted me until the girl walks away. I couldn't believe it. Jerry is a nice guy but I haven't seen a guy fuck up more peoples game in my life. He just walked around weaving a path of destruction.

Like some kind of anti-pussy tornado.

The guy who interrupted me and Jerry were tag team champions of cock blocking. They both ruined game for not just me but for the Mastermind who had something going with a hottie. Glott got it from the tag team, as well as from The Gout so he was screwed. What a weird night there were girls all around but there were dumbshits that wanted me to go home alone.

"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson

Last night was a strange night, I didn't plan on doing any time but there I was at the basement of the Underpants. I Mc'd and the show on a whole sucked pretty bad. Boxfart and the butterknife and some dipshit who told me that he was up from the comedy store in San Diego like I give a shit were there. Butterknife told me that he didn't give a shit he was going to just go up and fuck around cause they aren't paying him so they aren't going to get the "Greenjeans". I think he is nuts. He went up and ate shit like it was a snickers. I truly have no idea what goes through that guys head. His last bit made absolutely no sense and he didn't care. The club manager was non plused and I think that butterknife has to watch his ass or the time is going to start disappearing for him. He told me that he thinks I'm hilarious which was cool though. i don't dislike the guy I just don't understand not caring if you suck. Boxfart did his usual satire without punchlines or insight and I can't listen to it anymore. He is a nice guy but I find seal beatings to be funnier. OK now for the dipshit from San Diego he comes up to me before I introduce him and goes "I'm up from the comedy store in San Diego" I said ok...good for you. I don't know if he wanted me to introduce him that way like anyone gives a shit about that. Oh YOUR FROM THE big time almost L.A. only a couple hundred miles away. What do they have a softball team at the comedy store or something is this guy on some team or something. I don't walk around saying I'm The Enforcer from The Underpants in Seattle when I'm visiting Spokane. By the way he sucks shit so apparently he is third string at the comedy store. Their JV squad isn't that great apparently.

Mastermind was the only other mafia member in attendance he did well in fact I thought he was really good actually. He looked comfortable in his skin and comfortable with his jokes. I think his delivery has come a long way. I think the two of us were the only comics all night to get laughter. The highlight for me was when the manager told me that the highlight of the night was a new bit of mine and that he thinks it's brilliant. I got the brilliant tag on that joke a few times and that is confusing I didn't think I was capable of brilliant but it makes me squeal like a schoolgirl to hear it nonetheless.

I have a pork chop waiting for me at home tonight we'll see if I choose pork or comedy tonight....tough choices when your living large.

Hugs and Kisses,

The Enforcer

"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson

I did shitty last night at the open mic. I had too much to drink. That is all.

"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson