Metal

There is what I would call an amazing show coming up with Zeke, Motorhead, and corrosion of conformity coming soon.

This made me think about what would be my favorite metal band. You could argue that none of the three bands are actually metal. I would agree with you, I have always thought of those bands as straight rock even punk. With the exception of C.O.C which used to be a hardcore band and now is southern rock ala Lynnrd Skynnrd.

Ok here is the list of my favorite five metal bands of all time. These are in no particular order, I don't like lists.

1. At the Gates - Fucking kick ass evil metal, I want to worship satan when I listen to it.
2. Judas Priest - Come on they invented this shit. And the answer to the eternal question is KK Downing.
3. Slayer - No list is complete without these guys worst fucking solos ever but it just makes sense when it's coming from Slayer.
4. Sepultura - Still maybe my favorite metal band of all time. The new singer sucks ass. I am referring to the original lineup ending with the Roots album. These guys are so fucking good it's scary.
5. Metallica - I didn't want to include these guys cause they haven't made a passable album since 1988 they have put out far mor shitty albums then good ones. I just can't imagine including a list without a band that put out Ride the Lightening and Kill em all arguably the two greatest metal albums ever.

There are ton of bands that should be on here. Especially if you think of Black Sabbath as metal which would put them at the top of the list but I don't so there you go.

No one cares about this and Blaine knows far more about Metal then I do but I listened to punk in high school and fucking hated metal so my knowledge is limited.

-The Enforcer says "Your God is weak"

"Foxworthy's example of why women are smarter then men was hysterical"

Not depressing

Ok a couple of things happened on the way to Spokane this weekend one almost made me homicidal I was driving in traffic across the pass looked over and saw a truck the personalized license plate "gittrdn". Oh and check this out link.

Ok now none of this really bothers me it just reminds me that I live in a society full of people not like me.

Thats ok not everyone can be interesting.

Oh and read the reviews for this

if you don't want to read the reviews for the Blue collar comedy tour here are some that I have chosen:

"The best part about this comedy is that it is not repulsive and does not degrade any ones race or religion. To me, that is a sign of a true comic genius. All four artists in this performance are hysterical by themselves and when you set them up together for the finale...YOU WILL DIE LAUGHING!!!"

"Foxworthy's example of why women are smarter then men was hysterical"

"These guys are possibly the funniest stand-ups ever. How refreshing not to hear virtually ANY swear words, yet laugh so very hard. I don't want to give specific examples because I wouldn't want to ruin for anyone. I would most definitely let my children watch this and look forward to watching many times in the future. "

"This was an awesome, rib tickling, family safe movie. There was something for everyone. This was the hardest we laughed in months. Safe for children with "No Profanity". Clean safe and fun. Better than any comedy movie we have ever rented. Would love to own this one."

"The white kings of comedy! I have to say I didn't think this would be anywhere near as funny as the kings or queens of comedy, but I was wrong! They were hilarious!!!"

"If you're in the mood to laugh out loud and are looking for profanity-free entertainment (but you're not a prude), this is the movie for you! With 4 different comics, you're bound to find something to tickle your funny bone. You can safely watch it with the kids!"

"Blue Collar Comedy Tour is a refreshingly funny collection of lines and stories determined to make you bust a gut from laughing. No angry-man sour egos, no profanities, just good ol' boys having some fun that can be enjoyed by most of the family. For a great change of pace, slide this one into your DVD player."

"GREAT "movie" if all you want to do is laugh. I am from the South (Tennessee) and could relate to just about everything. Boy, we are rednecks!! Loved the segments in between each comedy act. Ending was the best."

"his was the funniest stand up I've seen since Spike Lee's Original Kings of Comedy in 2000"

" I had tears from my eyes from laughing so much. This is real comedians taking life as it is."

"I have to say that this was one of the two funniest stand up shows I have seen in recent memory, the other being Robin Williams."

"These four comedians are able to make you laugh just as much and as hard as Dennis Miller, George Carlin and Robin Williams but without the vulgarity."



Does anyone else see a trend, I think comics could learn a lot about listening to these reviews. One people like it clean and non threatening. Two, people are hopelessly stupid. Three, as long as you know two you will be ok. I love the fact that these guys are reminding people that there is still stand up comedy and people are loving it, the only problem is that people now want to see blue collar comedy wherever they go. I still think it has it's benefits, as long as I don't have to see fucking "gitterdn" license plates.

"Is it good juggling?"

Hi my name is unstable, will you hold my knife?

Ok another blow up at the world..a world that is getting sick of this shit. I freaked out again and got into a "I just wrote my last will and testament" bottom.

Over the weekend I spent an amazing 24 hours with my beautiful daughter who allowed me to remember that there are things to live for. I think I have figured out why I freak out so hard and want to be dead.

Problems:

A. I have been freakishly depressed for my entire life and this is no different. I am the poster bitch for depression.
B. I start getting my head on all the problems in my life and I can't see a way out. I always get the most depressed when it seems like I don't have any choices.
C. I have become extremely ego driven, I have started to feel somehow entitled to things I am not. Whenever I start thinking I'm "all that and a bag of chips" (thank you 1992) I get depressed. Ego is just not me and it makes me sad when I start feeling ego driven and needy.
D. Comedy is something that I love but I'm burned out on going to the clubs.

Solutions:
A. I am going to go to a therapist and start talking to someone, because otherwise I'm not going to make it to 40. This is probably all I need in addition to anti depressants to at least level off. I don't like being in my own mind so I can't imagine what people around me must feel.
B. Start dwelling on solutions, I feel instantly better as soon as I realize that I have choices. I don't have to work, I don't have to do anything. Things will work out one way or another. If I don't want to work for the rest of my life, how do I make that happen. Voila I feel better...for a little while...then repeat. I just have to remember to stay in a solutional way of thinking always.
C. I have found myself applying myself to some comedy hiarchy of late, which just doesn't work for me. Feeling like I'm entitled to time or that I should be working or that these other comics shouldn't be getting breaks before I do, is just silly. This is most of all just not me. Throughout my life I have been extremely confident in myself, but as soon as I think that I'm better then I really am I become needy and depressed. Things just don't seem to work out for me when i feel that way, even though things are working out just the way they are supposed to. I just feel like they aren't working out for me. I will never allow myself (or I will at least try) to feel envious or feel cheated by my friends success at any level. I can only control myself and I want others to succeed. I don't know when I started feeling so great about myself but it always leads me to thoughts of suicide (which is odd).
D. The only time I ever do well at comedy is when i go back to just trying to enjoy myself and get better. When I expect something or dwell on others I get frustrated. Everything good that has ever happened in comedy to me was when I let them, and didn't expect them. I will never quit comedy as much as it bothers me and makes me miserable, it's not comedy's fault it's my approach to what I'm doing that makes it so.

Ok .... off my chest. I need to get one more thing off my chest, I can't go to where I was last weekend again. I am going to try my damndest to avoid that for the rest of my life. I was as close to offing myself as I've ever been. I couldn't get out of a hateful cycle in my head. I for the first time just started planning on how to kill myself without everyone hating me (making funeral arrangements for instance so no one was stuck with the bill). I started planning the legal end of my death so no one would get screwed over. I imagine that I would be hated on some level for killing myself but I don't want to hand people a bill as well.

I feel 180 degrees different today. I feel like my future is what I make it. I understand that life isn't going to work out the way I want but that's ok. If I get funny that's good. If I don't thats ok too. I just want to keep doing comedy in my free time get as good as I can be and be a good dad. That's not too hard.

I have this fascination with strippers as of late. I just wonder what it would be like to date one. I think it would be fun in a constant drama kind of way. I think that would be the thing to do if you had money just to entertain yourself. Surround yourself with uninhibited not very bright people with a myriad of problems. That makes for some goddamned entertaining days and nights. And STD's.

-The Enforcer reminds you to "look for the eye of the tiger" when shopping for eggs.

"Is it good juggling?"