The Nicole Atkins show

Ok I have to admit it as much as I wanted to be in denial. Pegasus is not worth doing anymore. Not because I ate shit tonight, no I deserved that. No it has become Nicole Atkins black lesbian bonanza night and therefore it should be left for her and the headliner every night and everyone else shouldn't waste their time trying to do it. The moron ratio is just too high.

I think they should just be able to mentally masturbate on stage doing shitty material and making their equally retarded friends laugh while turning more and more less moronic people away at the door until it is just one big retard festival full of shiny objects and drool cloths. First ten in the door receive a shiny whistle that you can blow all night till your mommy and daddy read you to sleep. Ah tards you have a night yippy skippy, you are not so out of the norm in America you have your own night to talk and laugh and drink then fuck and spawn all kinds of half to fully retarded kids that then swim back of the river of stupid and do likewise.

I am done with you Pegasus until the tard factor is less.

I have enough issues with my shitty comedy and life to have to talk to you and your future extra chromosome spawn.

Good night and god bless,

The Enforcer

Where did my grand plans go?

I am going to start fucking blogging I can only masturbate so much while staring at a dirty apartment.

I had all these plans to concentrate on comedy while getting out of debt, but things happened. Lets take a look at the list of stuff that happened. I didn't receive my unemployment for a long time child support took too much money...blah blah...I got a DUI uh..oh... can't blame anyone else for that one ...fuck.

I am in a world of hurt but I will get through it, I am going to start working on the road as soon as possible. I am really excited. I have amazing friends, fuck it everything will be fine.

I have the mastermind he'll get me out of this thing he always has a good plan.

I am back to enjoying comedy again, I think being sober is the best thing I ever did for it. I am thinking clearly and have some ambition, makes me wonder how many bad things in my life have happened partly because of the fact I'm a um heavy drinker. One big difference is I have talked to women a couple of times after going out and have realized how fucking boring they are and wanted to get a long ways away from them. I am not sure I would have made that decision drunk, I may have been attracted to them ..gasp!

Any of you fuckers new to this particular blog should know that I don't spellcheck and really give a shit how bad my grammar because I don't care, this isn't Faulkner. Oh also I fucking love pork. I have decided to cut back a little on my pork diet, and eat more lean meats. Don't get me wrong me and swine are still tight we are just seeing other people right now.

Oh also because I'm sober and I am making better decisions with women doesn't mean I don't want to fuck ninety percent of the population cause I do, I just have to adjust to clearer vision of what I want to have sex with and then lie to myself.

Take it sleazy -> I love the 80's

The Enforcer

"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson

Hello my little plumpkins

Well I'm back.

Its been well over a month since my last blog. I had a lot of stressful shit going on so I didn't feel like writing about it. It took a month to get my unemployment. My severance was my pay through the end of April so by the time I had received my first check from the government it was the first week of May and I had spent almost all of my severance on living expenses and moving into a new place. I also received the wrong amount from unemployment because child support kept taking the wrong amount out. They owed me over 800 bucks at one point. They have started to pay me back but still owe me 275 bucks. So all my dreams about living ok on unemployment are gone. I have figured out that my budget for the time on unemployment is going to be about 30 bucks a week. Because I wasn't able to pay off my debt before going on it because of a whole bunch of bureaucratic fuckups. Life sucks.

In much better news I have been sober for the last week and really enjoying it. Of course I have been sober because I received a DUI last week.

Oh man I don't think getting a dui was such a good idea, I have no clue whatsoever how to pay for this. I am trying to get as much comedy work as I can right now I have called the local bookers. I am going to take this whole thing pretty serious for awhile and I am going to start working my ass off to get as much comedy work as I can. That is going to be how I pay my bills.

I will post more as the day goes on.

Rawk n Rowl,

The Enforcer