Friday, July 02, 2004

Pioneer Square

I started my job which is across from Occidental park or as some people call it - BUM PARK.

I am sure that I will start to see some pretty cool shit day to day.

Coming into work today I saw something pretty sweet. I look over and there is this bum standing in front of the door to my company. There is a guy approaching him in a business suit. The guy is missing an arm. The bum goes "Are you missing an arm" the guy goes "uh yeah" and walks in to the building. I look down and the bums pants are hanging and his cock is just sitting there for everyone to see. That is fucking sweet.

The new company I work for is chalk full of good looking people men and women. I guess advertising is where the beautiful people work. I am starting to think they just hired me for balance.


Got to go,

The Enforcer




"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson

Monday, June 28, 2004

My new job

Well I have begun a new career. Very very cool job and this part is the coolest about the whole thing. On my floor alone there are like 10 really hot women. Apparently myself and the manager are the only single men in the whole company. There are more women working here then men.

Oh god thank you.

Included in the group of women is a girl that I lusted after in high school. Ok that rules.

Oh and the job is freaking easy, so far.

Bad thing I only get paid once a month. Which means I am not getting paid for 4 more weeks. Lets see how long I live on ...no money.

Last part bad girl part good the yin and yang of my life.

TCB,

The Enforcer

Sunday, June 27, 2004

Oh Spokane how I love thee

Last night I decided to go down to the comedy club which is a attached to a sports bar/nightclub and write. Basically just get out of the house.

While sitting there I was approached and hit on by the hottest girl I have ever had hit on me by leaps and bounds. I don't normally rate women but this girl was a ten. She was also 21 and not concerned with my age. We proceeded to have the strangest goddammed conversation I've ever had. She told me how much she liked to fuck and then with no segue how much she wanted to be a estongenarian (or whatever) which is a skin care product girl at a beauty shop. She had a tongue piercing natural blonde hair (really not my deal). She let me know over and over again how great a catch she would be. She told me I could even beat the shit out of her and she wouldn't care. She also told me that she would support a guy completely and he wouldn't need to work or anything. Did I mention she said that I could beat the shit out of her and that wouldn't matter.

Now you're asking Enforcer you make no mention of taking said lovely girl home. Thats cause I Gotz no Skillz. I am having problems lately with sobriety trying to put up with women that are attractive but say inane shit and this was no different. Although I will say I actually tried because she was ridiculously attractive. To give you an idea of how attractive this girl is (if you have ever been to spokane)she was the most attractive girl in a large packed spokane bar. She was wearing a very short skirt a bear middriff and a tongue piercing that matched her shirt. Many people tried to cock block me don't they know this shit never happens to me. I finally talked to her one more time outside where we held each other and she told me her whole name and then said "you'll never remember". Like I'm some player that is so knee deep in women 13 years younger then himself that he just can't keep all the names together.

So in conclusion nothing happened. I went home and beat off twice thinking about nailing her and holy shit guys was I good.


what the fuck is her name again,

The Enforcer






"I should have ended with my Jesus fucking a goat bit" -Peter Johnson